How i end my 2018

As the year comes to an end and the new year is coming to a beginning, what have you achieved so far? A new house? A new car? Career? Name it, and i know it is all worth it.

What ive learn this year, despite with all the things i feel unnecessary, i achieve the best and greatest thing in my life.. not a car, not a house nor even any materialistic items; just a wonderful plain ol wedding!

It was an amazing journey to feel like a princess for the day and to enjoy each and every moment with your soulmate. The ambience of the whole entire day was a fairy tale. The hall was perfect, the food was great and i see people enjoying themselves endulging the foods and having small reunions together.

Me, on the other hand was a different story, I was shaken to the core thinking of ' what ifs' alot. It was in that moment i got cold feet and thinking of turning back and just want to dunk my head into the pool and not coming out. Well thanks to my friends who was there for me get me back to my sense with a lot of pep talks and advices. Thanks girls! You guys are awesome!

With that, i conclude my day. Lol. Just kidding!

I would like to give thanks to those who have helped me through the tough times,  the months that i have been a crazy person with a lot of attitude coming out, and i really am sorry to those i have hurt along the way.

Mom, dad thanks for being a sport in helping out and listening to your only daughter's request and im so grateful to the families, my squad (Maryam, Erin, Dee, Syafiqa, Mami, Farah, Mel, A'a, Seri ) for the bachelorette surprise; My girls ( Kathy, ween, gee, Jamie, Yaya, Nana) for being my flowers. And of course my sisters, Tasha And Ell for always listening to my crap when im down.

Thank you for making my wedding a reality with the forest theme even when the DJ is not doing such a good job in DJing my songs. However all turned out to be a blast.

Last but not least, to the man of my dream, my knight in shining armor, my Lapochka, Izwan Shazmeer. Thank you for loving me and being the best for me when I'm at my worst. Thank you for the happiness you have injected into my soul and make me who i am today. And i love everything about you.

Year End and What I Have Learn in 2017

It has been a rapid yet slow year as things just came crashing down like a hurricane. People coming in then leave without a say, be friends and unfriended; be nice then cruel and you can just look at how crazy this can get for any kind of reasons.

2017 has taught me a lot about love, friendship, cruelty, hypocrites and just how judgmental people are. It is funny how things just go from great sunny day to disastrous grey storm; starts with a hello, hi and ends with silence. 

Every thing starts with an innocent gesture of friendliness and self belonging and the next thing you know, people talked about you at how your past self is in terrible condition. It felt like all these storm came crashing down without you being aware of it. It comes crawling like a predator hunting for it's prey slowly yet surely to kill it, then BAMM! 

 I wonder how people can even cope with all this hatred from people around them? By being yourself and just go on with your everyday life, not giving a damn about those around you and focus on yourself, you still get this feeling of being an outcast in the society. What did you do to deserve all this? Just because you fall into a different status quo? A different style of living? A different way of thinking? or just for being different from them? 

No matter where you come from, or which cast you are in people will always be judgmental. No matter how hard you try to fit in or to gain their trust, they will always, ALWAYS talk about you. It is easy to absorb all this negative energy into your life because we are all emotional one or another, does not matter if you are a boy, or a girl or anything. It is a nerve wreck and destructive.

I learn to be strong from all of this situation and try to think positive about life and by doing so, is to be grateful for what you have and to love everything about it. Grateful for what you have achieve today, grateful for the shelter, grateful for your parents who have raised you to be a better person, grateful for all the things that had and is happening to you. That is the first step to be happy. 

I am happy to find a person so great to me by becoming one of the most important person in my life. The person who have been there throughout my journey in 2017, my ups and down, my downward spiral and all that is in between. I am grateful to god for bringing him to me as he have make me the happiest girl. During the tough times that I had in 2017, he is there to support me, to cheer me on and tell me that he is there for me no matter what. It is a great pleasure to know someone so pure, so innocent and full of joy.

We've been through a lot in these couple of month where people are trying to break us apart, pushed us to our limitations of breaking down, to the far end of discouragement in life and to the verge of embarrassment. With all of that being set, we stayed together stronger than ever despite all of the negativity being thrown towards us. I know things will get better in 2018 and we are much more by achieving what we imagine in life. I am so grateful and thankful to those who never believed in us.

Nothing gets in our way when you believe in yourself and have faith in what you do. You get to the far end of healthiness, wealthiness and happiness. The joy of being who you are and screwing with whatever people thrown at you by being true. Like Babe Ruth say "Don't let the fear of striking out, keeps you from playing the game"

Show them what you are capable of despite the time frame. You win some and you lose some that is what you call life. By having faith and belief, you get to where you want to be by hook or by crook. You are your own person and no one can change who you are by being the person you ought to be. They will try to bring you down as their will but you know yourself more than others and that is a plus. Never forget to be grateful towards the one who make you and the universe will catch on. Be happy and enjoy today as today is your last. 

My 2017, lets just say I am so grateful for all that is happening to me. I have found the love of my life, the greatest family a girl could have, incredible friends who are always there for me and most of all, to The Almighty who gave me life on earth. I am happy and grateful. 

Blood type and it's meaning

Wanna know what your personality means according to your blood type? Well, here's something you might wanna look at. It might not be a 100% true or just a lie to get attention, but hey! its something to look and read about don't it.. :) Enjoyyyyyyyy

Blood Type Personality Meaning

Type A

Advantages: obedient, careful, sympathetic, empathetic, self-sacrificing, polite, willing to compromise, honest, loyal 

Disadvantages: worries a lot, emotional, weak-willed, indecisive, introverted, anti-social, wishy-washy, nervous 

Type B

Advantages: cheerful, outgoing, optimistic, adventurous, active, sensitive, kind 

Disadvantages: forgetful, undecided, disorganized, noisy, spontaneous, prone to exaggeration 

Type AB

Advantages: sensitive, proud, diplomatic, discriminating, easy-going, sympathetic, efficient, learns quickly 

Disadvantages: short-tempered, complains, dependent, moody, brooding 

Type O 

Advantages: confident, strong-willed, judgmental, dedicated, self-deterministic 

Disadvantages: workaholic, insecure, emotional, stubborn, uncompromising, cold personality, over-confident, self-centered

Near To You

He and I had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional, it couldn't last
I loved him so but I let him go
'Cause I knew he'd never love me back

Such pain as this
Shouldn't have to be experienced
I'm still reeling from the loss,
Still a little bit delirious

Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.

You and I have something different
And I'm enjoying it cautiously
I'm battle scarred, I am working oh so hard
To get back to who I used to be

He's disappearing
Fading subtly
I'm so close to being yours
Won't you stay with me
Please

Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.

I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I belong
Where you are

Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
Though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on

Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.

Yet, I'm better near to you.

When You Were My Man

Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now
Our song on the radio but it don't sound the same
When our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down
Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name

It all just sounds like oooooh…
Mmm, too young, too dumb to realize
That you should have bought me flowers
And held my hand
Should have gave me all your hours
When you had the chance
Take me to every party
Cause all I wanted to do was dance
But now baby I’m dancing
But I’m dancing with another man

your pride, your ego, your needs, and your selfish ways
Caused a nice young love like me to walk out your life
Now we’ll never, never get to clean up the mess we made
And it haunts me every time I close my eyes

It all just sounds like oooooh…
Mmm, too young, too dumb to realize
That you should have bought me flowers
And held my hand
Should have gave me all your hours
When you had the chance
Take me to all parties
Cause all I wanted to do was dance
But now baby I’m dancing
But I’m dancing with another man

Though it hurts
I'll be the first to say I was wrong
Oh, I know I'm probably much too late
To try and apologize for the mistakes
But I just want you to know
He buys me flowers
And he holds my hand
And he gives me all his hours
Cause he has the chance
Takes me to all the parties
Cause he remembers how much I love to dance
Does all the things you shoulda done when you were my man

Does all the things you shoulda done when you were my man

What am i feeling for you now

Settle down with me, cover me up, cuddle me in
Lie down with me, yeah, and hold me in your arms
And your heart's against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck
I'm falling for your eyes but they don't know me yet
And with a feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now

Kiss me like you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love, falling in love, falling in love

Settle down with me and I'll be your safety, you'll be my lady
I was made to keep your body warm but I'm cold as the wind blows
So hold me in your arms
My heart's against your chest, your lips pressed to my neck
I'm falling for your eyes but they don't know me yet
And with this feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now

Kiss me like you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love, falling in love, falling in love

Yeah I've been feeling everything
From hate to love from love to lust from lust to truth
I guess that's how I know you
So hold you close to help you give it up

So kiss me like you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love, falling in love, falling in love
Kiss me like you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved
This feels like falling in love, falling in love, falling in love



---

Kiss Me - Ed Sheeran.

lip biting.. nyummy

Kiss Me

I was in a moment where Ed Sheeran's song was played on my ipod. The song is just sooooo lovely and im falling to my feet everytime i listen to it. Thanks to The Vampire Diaries who brought me to the song.

And now, I'm listening to a whole lot of covers on that song and this lad came in sight. He's wonderful with his cover, i fell in love that instant after hearing it. Lovely cover.. if you've been wondering which cover am i talking about, i'll post up the link at the bottom here so you can just listen to it. Make sure u close your eyes and put the headphones on and enjoy the ride.

This song reminds me on how to fall in love again after awhile being alone.. how it brings all the feelings together, the moment that you feel that you can't breath, you stand still and all the feeling comes rushing thru the whole entire of your body.. the butterflies in your stomach, the backflips that its doing and all sort of different feelings came rushing thru.

I was there in that feeling when i heard this song.. even when im alone in my room, as i put my headphone on.. lying on the bed with my eyes close.. it was the best feeling ever!! you should try.. it calms your heart from the heartbreak too as u imagine being happy for once in your life :)

I'm feeling it now, really.. the soft tone of the melody.. the swaying of the song..

I'm so in love <3<3


Neutful cover of Ed Sheeran - Kiss Me


Enjoy listening to it as i did :)

quotes of the day :)

 

 

 

girls, ladies... cray2!!

 

These girls had been awesome throughout the months and years that i've known them.. our cray2 moments will always be the fun side of it all~!! I miss u ladies loads!

 

 

Me, Zarra, Amanda, Syerah, Syazlin and Azzy <3

at VIMA 2013 :)

old wedding :)

As i was browsing thru old photos i came across these 2 awesome photos whereby it was when Dangsuria Zanurdin and Ad Samad Solemnization Ceremony. I know loads of you might dislike her for whatever happens on the 'On Air' show.. even i would say i don't like it either at the comments and shit, honestly.. i don't even know there's a show about it. haha.. funny shit.

So, back to the topic.. it was on her wedding day when people came to witness the two love birds getting hitched hand in hand. I was there to witness all of it from makeup to the solemnization and the karaoke session.. which for the fact that Afdlin Shauki sang while hanging at the gate.. that's funny.

Me, Rahim, Tony, Ad, Dangsuria, Tam, Danita

Ad, Dang, Me and Sara

 

 

The people i remembered being there was Afdlin Shauki, M. Nasir and his Wife, Mawi and his Wife, Neves from Pretty Ugly, Tam Spider, veterans such as Aziz Satar, and a few others that i didnt get to meet. They were all so lovely.. well not so sure. haha

 

By the end of the day.. they put up a booth for a karaoke session which Ana Raffali and M. Nasir had a duet and a few others sang for the newly weds. Afdlin won't get away from the microphone and he ended up singing outside of the gate to Ad. its one funny way to describe it as i was laughing my ass of sitting with them at the same table.

 

I love weddings... that's all i can say!!! free food and something to laugh and love about it.. meet new friends, gain a new family member and ofcourse the karaoke session.. :)

Go green, save the world

okay..i know its been along time since i've updated my blog..been bz for the whole year.. bz with assignments and all.. (this post was suppose to be post up in 2009; which i thought that i did n i didn't)

here's the thing, today i've learn something new in my classes..it is all about saving the world n we should go green. i know this topic had been talked about before this..but now students are talking about it too.. how to save the world and animals for adoption.

it is quite fun actually listening to my classmates present about it. other than that, another group presents about 'Trashing Fashion'. it is all about fashion with unwanted goods, such as old clothes that cant be fit anymore and try to make something new and creative. i also help them by modeling their clothes that they made out of plastic bags (that people throw rubbish in it). well it is for their mock-up presentation of course that they used it. still unused yet.

it's very fun actually, learning something new about saving the earth, being creative and etc. i've learned that not only human being live in this world, but other god's made too. So, make the world a better place for the future and also for the next generation.

I Wanna Do Bad Things With You.

 

 

 

Imposible to love - Jojo Levesque

Unthinkable, me leavin' you
It feels like we got somethin' for the record books
But you're unbearable, with the things you do
Every now and then I stop and take a second look

Half the time I don't know who you are
You're inconsistent, switchin' up your heart
I can't take this back and forth
It's killing me, you're about to push me away

Who are you?
Turn it, can ya tell me
Who are you?
Are you still my baby?
I thought I did, but I don't know who you are
Makes it impossible to love you

Baby, it's like I'm spinnin' around
The way I feel, I don't know if we're up or if we're down
I thought I did, but I don't know who you are
It's so impossible, impossible to love you
But I do, But I do

Unspeakable, the words I feel
So I keep em' to myself to spare you, baby
Unbreakable, 'cause I know it's real
Even when you're on the edge and talkin' crazy

Half the time I don't know who you are
You're inconsistent, switchin' up your heart
I can't take this back and forth
It's killing me, you're about to push me away

Don't know what it is you do to me
Or understand what you're goin' through with me
But it's impossible for me to live without you and me
I'm tryin' hard as I can to see
I'm holdin' long as I can to keep
You here I just need my man with me
I need to understand
Who are you?